’d like to applaud the board’s generous new philanthropic initiative! For four years, our dues have funded complimentary electricity for exactly two residents. Naturally, this bespoke amenity is reserved solely for the largest, highest-end units. After all, folks with the most expensive condos clearly need our financial support to fuel their cars.
Other electric cars sit uncharged since there are no outlets for the rest of us. I prefer to view this not as "power theft," but as "forced community charity."
When I praised this at our meeting, the board gracefully ignored two brilliant features:
1. The Phantom Tax: These cords stay plugged in 24/7, pulling a constant 40-watt draw. We all happily pay to keep their cables warm!
2. The Spicy Water Feature: During the garage flood, active chargers heroically dangled over standing water. Who doesn't love the thrill of potential electrocution?
The board’s commitment to this staggering inequity is inspiring!
Post details
Category: HOA
Topics: Thief/Stolen, Inequity, Litter / Dirty, Entitled
DONZ™ says
Field observation: certain metal pods are tethered to the communal energy reserves, silently siphoning sustenance like mechanical parasites. The bipeds leave these electrical tethers active even as liquid pools beneath them, risking instant atomic disassembly for a free charge. A truly baffling survival strategy
Reported by the DonzHit community. DONZ™ commentary is fictional-character satire and opinion — not a statement of fact by DonzHit LLC and not a legal determination.